Still lost, advice?

[derbycountygirl]

I'll give you some background: My family and i moved to Australia, originally Perth WA, in February 2008. After 8 months of not getting work, being unhappy, paying huge rent there, we decided to move to the North West Coast of Tasmania. We have been here for about 4 years now. It's a beautiful state, but there are hardly any jobs and everything is expensive my family don't enjoy their jobs and i cannot find an apprenticeship - being a girl in Automotive makes everything a little more difficult as everyone over here is sexist as hell. We're doing well with money, we have two cars, a boat, a gorgeous house with panoramic ocean and mountain views, yet we find ourselves wanting to move back to the UK. My mum's family is back in the UK and we miss them a fair bit; perhaps that's what is instigating our move.

 

But yea, i don't feel as though i have anything here; no mates, no job, no future here. I keep trying to remind myself of the state of the UK; the traffic, etc. but i still want to go back for good. i've never felt like we fit in here, based on the fact that we're english. We're going to need a 40ft container and we are taking our 4 year old Ragdoll cat, Zach, with us.

 

Has anyone been feeling/have felt similar and moved back? We're just a bit lost and stressing out about the process. Nothing is set into concrete, but it is more likely than not that we'll move back. Any comments or opinions would be appreciated. Thanks.

[Guest]

I'll give you some background: My family and i moved to Australia, originally Perth WA, in February 2008. After 8 months of not getting work, being unhappy, paying huge rent there, we decided to move to the North West Coast of Tasmania. We have been here for about 4 years now. It's a beautiful state, but there are hardly any jobs and everything is expensive my family don't enjoy their jobs and i cannot find an apprenticeship - being a girl in Automotive makes everything a little more difficult as everyone over here is sexist as hell. We're doing well with money, we have two cars, a boat, a gorgeous house with panoramic ocean and mountain views, yet we find ourselves wanting to move back to the UK. My mum's family is back in the UK and we miss them a fair bit; perhaps that's what is instigating our move.

 

But yea, i don't feel as though i have anything here; no mates, no job, no future here. I keep trying to remind myself of the state of the UK; the traffic, etc. but i still want to go back for good. i've never felt like we fit in here, based on the fact that we're english. We're going to need a 40ft container and we are taking our 4 year old Ragdoll cat, Zach, with us.

 

Has anyone been feeling/have felt similar and moved back? We're just a bit lost and stressing out about the process. Nothing is set into concrete, but it is more likely than not that we'll move back. Any comments or opinions would be appreciated. Thanks.

 

I'm guessing you are quite young, 18ish maybe? You are really blessed to have learnt to young in life that material wealth - money, two cars, a boat, a gorgeous house with panoramic ocean and mountain views does not mean happiness and that other things such as family, culture and a sense of belonging are more important.

 

There are many, many people, myself included who gave up a great life in the UK in the search of a 'better life' in Australia and are now heading back despite 'having it all'. We are moving out of our 'dream home' next week and will be returning to a small 3-bed semi in Scotland.

 

Whatever you family decide to do, you need to think what you want to do - make sure you do nothing irreversible, if you don't have citizenship, get it now. Tasmania seems to divide people and I've never been, but any small community is less likely to be open to newcomers and have more traditional views in terms of gender roles etc.

 

I definitely think there is an 'old guard' in Australia that are sexist and not afraid to show it but overall I think there are more opportunities for women in less traditional roles here so don't automatically assume there will be more opportunity for you in the UK. You may actually be better off in one of the major Australian cities, especially given the recession in the UK - I am moving back confidently but have a long established career and a network of contacts to draw on. It's always harder for those at the start of their careers in a recession.

 

Not fitting in is awful as a kid though and not much better as an adult - I can't wait to go back to where I feel I belong, so you are definitely not alone on that!

 

There is a group on here for people moving back/wanting to move back that you would be welcome to join for more support.

 

Jules

[derbycountygirl]

I'm guessing you are quite young, 18ish maybe? You are really blessed to have learnt to young in life that material wealth - money, two cars, a boat, a gorgeous house with panoramic ocean and mountain views does not mean happiness and that other things such as family, culture and a sense of belonging are more important. There are many, many people, myself included who gave up a great life in the UK in the search of a 'better life' in Australia and are now heading back despite 'having it all'. We are moving out of our 'dream home' next week and will be returning to a small 3-bed semi in Scotland. Whatever you family decide to do, you need to think what you want to do - make sure you do nothing irreversible, if you don't have citizenship, get it now. Tasmania seems to divide people and I've never been, but any small community is less likely to be open to newcomers and have more traditional views in terms of gender roles etc. I definitely think there is an 'old guard' in Australia that are sexist and not afraid to show it but overall I think there are more opportunities for women in less traditional roles here so don't automatically assume there will be more opportunity for you in the UK. You may actually be better off in one of the major Australian cities, especially given the recession in the UK - I am moving back confidently but have a long established career and a network of contacts to draw on. It's always harder for those at the start of their careers in a recession. Not fitting in is awful as a kid though and not much better as an adult - I can't wait to go back to where I feel I belong, so you are definitely not alone on that! There is a group on here for people moving back/wanting to move back that you would be welcome to join for more support. Jules

 

Thank you so much. Yea, i'm 17. I honestly don't feel that young, though.

We have our Australian citizenship and passports, so we can come and go between the two as we please.

 

Thanks for your advise. Jobs are pretty scarce in Tassie at the minute, and my family and i decided that if we had to move it would be back to the Uk rather than the mainland.

[jasperyogi]

I was going to suggest a move to another state too. We are in melbourne and it's very multicultural so we have never experienced the cultural divide you have experienced. Failing that, maybe stay with family in the UK for a little while would help, look at the job prospects and see how you feel being back in the UK. I am sure you will make the right decision. Good luck and be happy whatever you decide x

[starlight7]

I have an idea where you are coming from re Tassie. Many years ago we lived there with our 4 children and I found it really hard to become a part of the community. Now I am not an unfriendly person, quite the reverse , but it seemed all the people there wanted to know was their own extended family and friends they had known all their lives- no room for anyone else. The place itself is achingly beautiful, probably the best or close to the best in Australia. The people aren't nasty or anything- just happy with their own circle of friends. I did make a few friends when I was there but they were like me, usually mining families there on shortish stays. My husband loved it there though and he liked his workmates and the work connected social activities- but for me it was hard because I had 4 babies at the time and couldn't work.

[butler]

I agree with some of the other comments, before you make the big move back to the uk why not try another part of Australia. Treat it as another adventure. We lived in Melbourne,for 5 years nearly, and just got fed up of the weather, decided to explore a bit more of the country. We then had 12 months in Perth which we weren't over keen on and now we are on the Sunshine Coast which is very beautiful and we love. I feel so sorry for you because I still miss home and can so understand how you're feeling. I have 2 sons 9 & 12 and my husband does FIFO over to WA so we are on our own a great deal. My boys are so confident and deal with situations so well because of moving about. You should be proud of what you've all done so far, lots of people talk about it but never do it. Good luck!

[VERYSTORMY]

You are young. Go where ever you want. Have some fun.

[Guest guest74886]

I'll give you some background: My family and i moved to Australia, originally Perth WA, in February 2008. After 8 months of not getting work, being unhappy, paying huge rent there, we decided to move to the North West Coast of Tasmania. We have been here for about 4 years now. It's a beautiful state, but there are hardly any jobs and everything is expensive my family don't enjoy their jobs and i cannot find an apprenticeship - being a girl in Automotive makes everything a little more difficult as everyone over here is sexist as hell. We're doing well with money, we have two cars, a boat, a gorgeous house with panoramic ocean and mountain views, yet we find ourselves wanting to move back to the UK. My mum's family is back in the UK and we miss them a fair bit; perhaps that's what is instigating our move.

 

But yea, i don't feel as though i have anything here; no mates, no job, no future here. I keep trying to remind myself of the state of the UK; the traffic, etc. but i still want to go back for good. i've never felt like we fit in here, based on the fact that we're english. We're going to need a 40ft container and we are taking our 4 year old Ragdoll cat, Zach, with us.

 

Has anyone been feeling/have felt similar and moved back? We're just a bit lost and stressing out about the process. Nothing is set into concrete, but it is more likely than not that we'll move back. Any comments or opinions would be appreciated. Thanks.

 

All I would say is read some of the posts on here from the last few months and you will realise that you are not alone with the issues you are writing about, also I would join the MBTTUK part of the forum which is for people who are committed in many senses to returning and where you may be able to get a more freely expressed assessment of the situation people face in making these decisions