Rachandian Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 Me and my partner have just returned to UK from an amazing year in Australia. We settled in Melbourne, both worked and loved the lifestyle. We are 28 and 30 and were both offered sponsorships as we have trades. (We would of had to pay the company back) . We decided financially we would be better off in the UK. We already have a home here but we have it rented out. Since being ring back in the UK, I'm missing Melbourne! The food, the coffee the sun and how relaxed it is and spacious ! Deep down I know our families don't want us to return to Australia but we don't know what to do for the best. When I was there I missed family,up until I knew our flight was booked home. Then I was ok and didn't want to come back. We are at the age now for children and we just don't know what to do. I don't think I could have children and then take them away from family. I thought I would post on here and seen what everyone's opinion is . Thank you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perthbum Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 The food and coffee :eek: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 When I was there I missed family,up until I knew our flight was booked home. Then I was ok and didn't want to come back. We are at the age now for children and we just don't know what to do. I don't think I could have children and then take them away from family. I thought I would post on here and seen what everyone's opinion is . Thank you If you're worried about that now, then I'd expect your feelings will only get worse once you've had a baby. Just browse around these forums and notice how many women are leaving - or are tempted to leave - their husbands to go back to the UK with their new baby. Not to say that would happen to you, but if you're thinking of starting a family, I think it would be best to delay emigration until after your first baby - you'll have a better idea of your feelings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gbye grey sky Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 Me and my partner have just returned to UK from an amazing year in Australia. We settled in Melbourne, both worked and loved the lifestyle. We are 28 and 30 and were both offered sponsorships as we have trades. (We would of had to pay the company back) . We decided financially we would be better off in the UK. We already have a home here but we have it rented out. Since being ring back in the UK, I'm missing Melbourne! The food, the coffee the sun and how relaxed it is and spacious ! Deep down I know our families don't want us to return to Australia but we don't know what to do for the best. When I was there I missed family,up until I knew our flight was booked home. Then I was ok and didn't want to come back. We are at the age now for children and we just don't know what to do. I don't think I could have children and then take them away from family. I thought I would post on here and seen what everyone's opinion is . Thank you I would suggest that you to make it a successful move (and by successful I mean happy with your decision) you have to be a bit selfish. Most of all though you have to be determined and really confident of your decision and your reasons. Reading your post I sense that you are the polar opposite of that so IMO it is not the right time in your lives to be considering this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Roberto Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 It's not a 'black and white' issue as every case is different, but in part, I'd say yes (depending on your set up in the UK). A little bit... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 Absolutely you have o be selfish to move. And self sufficient and quite hard hearted into the bargain. If you aren't then you will suffer - if you're going to be wracked with guilt at every little thing then it won't be easy. I don't mean these terms in a pejorative way, more like a survival strategy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Roberto Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 Absolutely you have o be selfish to move. And self sufficient and quite hard hearted into the bargain. If you aren't then you will suffer - if you're going to be wracked with guilt at every little thing then it won't be easy. I don't mean these terms in a pejorative way, more like a survival strategy. That's quite a good way of looking at it. Even if you cause some upset by going, I doubt anyone would want to be miserable, or wish it on anyone in their family who is going... so if you are gonna do it, you should try not to suffer too much. Thanks for that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaptainR Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 I definitely believe that being selfish is a major part of a successful expat lifestyle, there are times when the kids Skype my parents that I can see tears in my mums eyes. We made the decision to move to Oz as we believe it is the best opportunity for us as a family to the exclusion of everyone else. When my son was born, we did temporarily move back to my wife's home so she could be with her Mum for support, that was crucial. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxlornaxx Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 i am selfish and i moved with no problems, i would say yes you need to be a bit selfish..but most of us have to be a bit selfish at some point in order to be happy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachandian Posted March 5, 2015 Author Share Posted March 5, 2015 Thank you everyone for your replies. I suppose we will give it a few months here but deep down I know I should of taken the opportunity in Australia Thanks again Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petals Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 If you can move before you have children its a good idea. That way you get to have the freedom to meet new people, expand your job prospects and look at an area where you can bring up a family. We had no children when we arrived and we had five years before having children and it was our best decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chortlepuss Posted March 5, 2015 Share Posted March 5, 2015 At your age you are very much in demand in Australia - this changes as you get older, so if you're unsure now may be a good time to spend some time here, get your citizenship and keep options open for the future. Once you have kids you are more constrained - and it is very challenging for young mums (and maybe dads) to be away from their support group and network of friends once they have a new baby. If you do have a baby here though it is a good 'in' to friendship groups - but you will miss your family! It's a difficult one but right now you are pretty free to come and go as you wish - as for being selfish, so what? It's your life so go with the flow.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
docboat Posted March 6, 2015 Share Posted March 6, 2015 Selfish? Of course. You are, after all, supposed to live YOUR life, not somebody elses life. You choose, with your partner, to make a life for you and yourselves - and for you and yourselves alone. If you start creating your life around someone elses life, then you are not living your life to the full potential. So go with your passion, and make your life as perfect as you can. IF that "perfect" means that you live for another family (even if it is your own close family members) and IF that choice is because it represents your freedom and passion, then go for it and stay in the UK. Just be aware of the underlying motivations, because if you mistake them, you end up less happy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachandian Posted October 5, 2023 Author Share Posted October 5, 2023 Hello again , I am back !! NEAR 8 YEARS later .... Now with a 7 year old . We want to go back .. we are now near 40 but both on the skilled list . Eeeekkkk!!! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SophW Posted October 6, 2023 Share Posted October 6, 2023 Best of luck with whatever you do! I was in Australia in June and can absolutely see the appeal for bringing up kids. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachandian Posted October 6, 2023 Author Share Posted October 6, 2023 It's so hard . He's now age 7 we are 37 and 39 and Aus still had this hold on us. We took our son there for 1 month when he was 2 YO and loved it I've no idea what's to do for the best x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InnerVoice Posted October 7, 2023 Share Posted October 7, 2023 4 hours ago, Rachandian said: It's so hard . He's now age 7 we are 37 and 39 and Aus still had this hold on us. We took our son there for 1 month when he was 2 YO and loved it I've no idea what's to do for the best x It sounds like you've got your hearts set on returning to Oz and you mentioned that you have trades behind you, so you'll have no difficulty finding work over here. You're still at a good age to emigrate, your son isn't that old it will cause a huge disruption to his education, and you've already experience Australian life - warts and all. I'd be asking myself what have we got to lose? However... You also mentioned in your original post 7 years ago that "I don't think I could have children and then take them away from family", so clearly this is something you're going to need to reconcile - both with yourself and your family. I'd be inclined to have a chat with everyone first, explain how you feel, and see what kind of reaction you get. They may be more supportive than you expect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.