How Long before you realised that Australia was or was not the place that you wanted to spend the rest of your days ?

[Ken]

2 minutes ago, FirstWorldProblems said:

Sending a message to other member countries that if you leave, you'll want to come back perhaps?  And we'll accept you back, but on lesser terms than you had, and you'll do it because it's still better than being outside the worlds largest trading bloc.

They'll like the message "that if you leave, you'll want to come back", but I'm not sure they'll want to send the message "we'll accept you back" (even if it's on worse terms) because if countries know there will be an option to come back, leaving become a less scary choice.

[BendigoBoy]

46 minutes ago, Ken said:

I think it's far from inevitable that the EU will ever want the UK back. What's in it for them?

If I was an EU member state, I'd be struggling to see the benefit of allowing a febrile nation back into the fold.

De Gaulle must be grinning from above and slapping his thigh. The clever man vetoed the UK joining for solid, sensible reasons. 

[Bulya]

1 hour ago, Ken said:

I think it's far from inevitable that the EU will ever want the UK back. What's in it for them?

True.  Who would? 

[calNgary]

9 minutes ago, Bulya said:

True.  Who would? 

but that topic is for all a whole new thread, not this one.. 

                 Cal x

[Bulya]

2 minutes ago, calNgary said:

but that topic is for all a whole new thread, not this one.. 

                 Cal x

Agreed 

[Tulip1]

9 hours ago, Marisawright said:

Worth pointing out, that could just be the difference between city attitudes and country attitudes anywhere in the world.

Very likely.  I see random acts of kindness all the time.  Most people are good and kind not nasty and bad.  For the person to say it is very very unusual, well I can’t imagine what shit place they live in but it’s not a true reflection of British folk. 

[Blue Manna]

Turns out Rayner was quite right in her capital gains tax affairs. Nothing to answer for.

[jimmyay1]

so glad i don't have to really care about the minutiae of UK politics any more. that's one benefit of living overseas. 

Edited May 30 by jimmyay1

[Ken]

6 minutes ago, jimmyay1 said:

so glad i don't have to really care about the minutiae of UK politics any more. that's one benefit of living overseas. 

Yes, I just had to google "Rayner capital gains tax" to find out who on earth Rayner is and what Blue Manna was referring to.

[jonnysav]

Sadly, I knew very quickly I hated Australia, yet, I now find myself unable to leave because I can't hurt my family in that way. I will have to wait yet another ten years, yearning to go back to Gloucestershire, before I can face making the decision. I know my children have had a better start here than in the UK, but my soul is destroyed. Every year in Australia twists the knife deeper, the longing greater, the struggle to maintain face and stay strong. Even going back to visit (which would cost close to $15k) would exacerbate my feelings. Help.

[Quoll]

22 minutes ago, jonnysav said:

Sadly, I knew very quickly I hated Australia, yet, I now find myself unable to leave because I can't hurt my family in that way. I will have to wait yet another ten years, yearning to go back to Gloucestershire, before I can face making the decision. I know my children have had a better start here than in the UK, but my soul is destroyed. Every year in Australia twists the knife deeper, the longing greater, the struggle to maintain face and stay strong. Even going back to visit (which would cost close to $15k) would exacerbate my feelings. Help.

Just want to say you’re not alone but there are no magic answers to what ails us. If you’re stuck because of family, finances etc then unfortunately the only thing you can do is to live with it. I find CBT strategies helpful. I reframe away from being the victim into acknowledging it’s my choice and I have a toolbox of tricks to get me through the day.  When the feelings are, as you say, destroying your soul to the point that it makes getting out of bed every day so bloody hard, the best thing to do is to approach your GP and ask for a mental health plan and seek out a counsellor who might help with the intrusive thinking (CBT, ACT). I’d steer clear of antidepressants but the condition you describe is most likely situational depression, cured only by removal from the situation.  When you’ve got your head around your thinking and how to manage it, invite your OH into the process to work out ways in which there can be compromise on both sides but certainly making them aware that you’re feeling like sh!t because you’re in the wrong place. 
 

Good luck, you can do it!

[alex-op]

It took me about a year to realize that Australia was where I wanted to settle. Initially, the excitement of a new environment masked the challenges, but over time, I fell in love with the lifestyle, diverse culture, and breathtaking nature. The supportive community and opportunities made it clear that this was the place for me. However, everyone's experience is different; some find it sooner, while others take longer. It’s a journey of self-discovery, and you'll know when it feels right.

[Canada2Australia]

Well, it's been almost 9 years since moving to Aus, and I've enjoying my time here for the most part. However, I am feeling the urge to move back home. I don't feel as 'in love' with the country anymore, and I do miss my family and friends tremendously. I am thankful for the time I've had here, good and bad. But I am starting to think now is the time to make the move. The housing market here in Mackay is bonkers, and I live in one of the most in-demand postal codes in the country, so I would male some good money. I have a place to stay when I get back, and I would just need to find work, which may take awhile but I should be alright. 

Decisions, decisions.

 

Edited September 24 by Canada2Australia

[Amber Snowball]

1 hour ago, Canada2Australia said:

Well, it's been almost 9 years since moving to Aus, and I've enjoying my time here for the most part. However, I am feeling the urge to move back home. I don't feel as 'in love' with the country anymore, and I do miss my family and friends tremendously. I am thankful for the time I've had here, good and bad. But I am starting to think now is the time to make the move. The housing market here in Mackay is bonkers, and I live in one of the most in-demand postal codes in the country, so I would male some good money. I have a place to stay when I get back, and I would just need to find work, which may take awhile but I should be alright. 

Decisions, decisions.

 

Yes, fell out of love. Pretty much where I was. I didn’t move back for friends/family, but I feel a sense of belonging back in the UK, that I struggle to verbalise. I have an appreciation for the aboriginal view that the earth doesn’t belong to you, you belong to the earth.

Good luck with your decision. I returned to the UK in a reasonable financial position due to the Australian housing market and my superannuation over there remains a healthy chunk of my retirement plans, but all the positives I can speak of remain financial, which sums it up for me. That’s what it was. Financially positive, until it wasn’t. The cost of living really started to bite towards the end.

 I left in 2018 and haven’t regretted it, but that’s me. 
Good luck!

 

[Marisawright]

1 hour ago, Canada2Australia said:

Well, it's been almost 9 years since moving to Aus, and I've enjoying my time here for the most part. However, I am feeling the urge to move back home. I don't feel as 'in love' with the country anymore, and I do miss my family and friends tremendously. I am thankful for the time I've had here, good and bad. But I am starting to think now is the time to make the move. The housing market here in Mackay is bonkers, and I live in one of the most in-demand postal codes in the country, so I would male some good money. I have a place to stay when I get back, and I would just need to find work, which may take awhile but I should be alright. 

It doesn't sound like a hard decision to me.  I'd say once you start feeling like that, the feeling won't go away, so there's no point in delaying the move.  You've had a great time in Australia but you've exhausted what it has to offer you.  And it doesn't sound like going home will be too costly.  The sooner you go back home, the sooner you can re-establish yourself and make sure you've got your pension etc sorted.  

[Canada2Australia]

I have my citizenship, so that is sorted.

Yes, luckily the Social Security agreement between the two countries allows for time spent in both countries to go toward the Age Security fund in Australia and The Canadian Pension Plan and Old Age Security funds in Canada. I confirmed today that I would indeed qualify for both, so there are no concerns there, unless the agreement is changed so drastically that I would suddenly miss qualifying in 20ish years time when I can apply, but I don't see that happening otherwise many people would be in a heap of trouble. So I feel fairly safe in going home.

Plus, most provinces have private pension plans for public servants, as does the federal government, which is yet another incentive for me to return. The more I think about it, the more comfortable I feel about heading home.

I'm starting to feel like I've unofficially made the decision to move.

[Amber Snowball]

24 minutes ago, Canada2Australia said:

I have my citizenship, so that is sorted.

Yes, luckily the Social Security agreement between the two countries allows for time spent in both countries to go toward the Age Security fund in Australia and The Canadian Pension Plan and Old Age Security funds in Canada. I confirmed today that I would indeed qualify for both, so there are no concerns there, unless the agreement is changed so drastically that I would suddenly miss qualifying in 20ish years time when I can apply, but I don't see that happening otherwise many people would be in a heap of trouble. So I feel fairly safe in going home.

Plus, most provinces have private pension plans for public servants, as does the federal government, which is yet another incentive for me to return. The more I think about it, the more comfortable I feel about heading home.

I'm starting to feel like I've unofficially made the decision to move.

Well done! Sounds like you have decided without some of the tearing yourself apart that others go through. I was pretty much the same, I mulled the practicalities for a bit, but once I had decided I was like a bull at a gate!

[Canada2Australia]

28 minutes ago, Amber Snowball said:

Well done! Sounds like you have decided without some of the tearing yourself apart that others go through. I was pretty much the same, I mulled the practicalities for a bit, but once I had decided I was like a bull at a gate!

I would say this feeling started as a pea-sized feeling after I came back from a visit home two years ago. It has grown slowly since. Then when I came back from another visit home this past July, the feeling became much more powerful. I guess you just know when it's finally time to pull the plug and take the leap.

And yes, I'm happy to not be agonising over this to the point of delirium like some do. I will miss some of things out here like living close to the beach and tropical rainforests, but I will be living in a province with 100,000 lakes, including the 10th largest lake in the world, and forests galore. There will be no shortage of natural environment to explore.

Edited September 24 by Canada2Australia

[Marisawright]

58 minutes ago, Canada2Australia said:

And yes, I'm happy to not be agonising over this to the point of delirium like some do. 

I think Brits are more likely to agonise.   For one thing, Brits have grown up with a golden picture of Australia from years of TV series (Neighbours and Home & Away), so when someone mentions coming home to the UK, their family can't understand it.  To them, that person is living in paradise, so they'd be absolutely mad to come home, and they'll say so!  The other thing is that, if you watch the reports in Australia, you'd think the UK was a complete basket case, so you'd be worried about having a much-reduced quality of life. 

I agree you've made up your mind.  enjoy!

[Amber Snowball]

8 hours ago, Canada2Australia said:

I would say this feeling started as a pea-sized feeling after I came back from a visit home two years ago. It has grown slowly since. Then when I came back from another visit home this past July, the feeling became much more powerful. I guess you just know when it's finally time to pull the plug and take the leap.

And yes, I'm happy to not be agonising over this to the point of delirium like some do. I will miss some of things out here like living close to the beach and tropical rainforests, but I will be living in a province with 100,000 lakes, including the 10th largest lake in the world, and forests galore. There will be no shortage of natural environment to explore.

Yep. I was 10 years in Oz without a thought of the UK, not even visiting. Then the itch started so a visit back in 2015. Thought I was still better in Oz but by 2017 it was another trip back to really think about it and then moved in 2018. It sounds protracted but until I returned from the trip in 2017 it didn’t really take up much of my thinking time! 
Sounds like you have something/somewhere fab to move to so all power to you!

[not a hillbilly]

18 hours ago, Amber Snowball said:

I feel a sense of belonging back in the UK, that I struggle to verbalise. I have an appreciation for the aboriginal view that the earth doesn’t belong to you, you belong to the earth.

Good luck with your decision. I returned to the UK in a reasonable financial position due to the Australian housing market and my superannuation over there remains a healthy chunk of my retirement plans, but all the positives I can speak of remain financial, which sums it up for me. That’s what it was. Financially positive, until it wasn’t. The cost of living really started to bite towards the end.

 I left in 2018 and haven’t regretted it, but that’s me. 
Good luck!

 

I really miss the UK & want to go back, Oz has literally nothing for me. But being 66yrs old, financially I most probably can't afford to.  It's really hard to judge the living costs from here so will have to settle for watching "Escape to the Country" & maybe one last 4-week trip back. I did try to go back in 1999 but no help from relatives & got the run-around by Govt & banks there 

Canada & N.Z. seem the best choices these days as Starmer has a long way to go to fix the UK.

Edited September 25 by not a hillbilly

[Marisawright]

2 hours ago, not a hillbilly said:

 got the run-around by Govt & banks there 

I'm sure you didn't.  I agree, the red tape when you go back is annoying.  You have to establish a permanent address first, before you can do things like open a bank account or register for benefits etc.  But that's something you need to research before you go, and if you're prepared, it's manageable.  

[Cheery Thistle]

On 24/09/2024 at 09:53, Marisawright said:

if you watch the reports in Australia, you'd think the UK was a complete basket case, so you'd be worried about having a much-reduced quality of life. 

It is a basket case. 

[shaunfreo]

10 hours ago, Cheery Thistle said:

It is a basket case. 

In your opinion

[Canada2Australia]

11 hours ago, Cheery Thistle said:

It is a basket case. 

The thing is, most Western developed countries are basketcases to a degree these days, even Australia and Canada. But I don’t let that stop me from making a decision to be where I want to be. There are many factors at play for assessment and evaluation, and at the end of the day, finances and personal needs are the elements steering me in the direction of moving home.