How Long before you realised that Australia was or was not the place that you wanted to spend the rest of your days ?

[Ken]

2 minutes ago, FirstWorldProblems said:

Sending a message to other member countries that if you leave, you'll want to come back perhaps?  And we'll accept you back, but on lesser terms than you had, and you'll do it because it's still better than being outside the worlds largest trading bloc.

They'll like the message "that if you leave, you'll want to come back", but I'm not sure they'll want to send the message "we'll accept you back" (even if it's on worse terms) because if countries know there will be an option to come back, leaving become a less scary choice.

[BendigoBoy]

46 minutes ago, Ken said:

I think it's far from inevitable that the EU will ever want the UK back. What's in it for them?

If I was an EU member state, I'd be struggling to see the benefit of allowing a febrile nation back into the fold.

De Gaulle must be grinning from above and slapping his thigh. The clever man vetoed the UK joining for solid, sensible reasons. 

[Bulya]

1 hour ago, Ken said:

I think it's far from inevitable that the EU will ever want the UK back. What's in it for them?

True.  Who would? 

[calNgary]

9 minutes ago, Bulya said:

True.  Who would? 

but that topic is for all a whole new thread, not this one.. 

                 Cal x

[Bulya]

2 minutes ago, calNgary said:

but that topic is for all a whole new thread, not this one.. 

                 Cal x

Agreed 

[Tulip1]

9 hours ago, Marisawright said:

Worth pointing out, that could just be the difference between city attitudes and country attitudes anywhere in the world.

Very likely.  I see random acts of kindness all the time.  Most people are good and kind not nasty and bad.  For the person to say it is very very unusual, well I can’t imagine what shit place they live in but it’s not a true reflection of British folk. 

[Blue Manna]

Turns out Rayner was quite right in her capital gains tax affairs. Nothing to answer for.

[jimmyay1]

so glad i don't have to really care about the minutiae of UK politics any more. that's one benefit of living overseas. 

Edited May 30 by jimmyay1

[Ken]

6 minutes ago, jimmyay1 said:

so glad i don't have to really care about the minutiae of UK politics any more. that's one benefit of living overseas. 

Yes, I just had to google "Rayner capital gains tax" to find out who on earth Rayner is and what Blue Manna was referring to.

[jonnysav]

Sadly, I knew very quickly I hated Australia, yet, I now find myself unable to leave because I can't hurt my family in that way. I will have to wait yet another ten years, yearning to go back to Gloucestershire, before I can face making the decision. I know my children have had a better start here than in the UK, but my soul is destroyed. Every year in Australia twists the knife deeper, the longing greater, the struggle to maintain face and stay strong. Even going back to visit (which would cost close to $15k) would exacerbate my feelings. Help.

[Quoll]

22 minutes ago, jonnysav said:

Sadly, I knew very quickly I hated Australia, yet, I now find myself unable to leave because I can't hurt my family in that way. I will have to wait yet another ten years, yearning to go back to Gloucestershire, before I can face making the decision. I know my children have had a better start here than in the UK, but my soul is destroyed. Every year in Australia twists the knife deeper, the longing greater, the struggle to maintain face and stay strong. Even going back to visit (which would cost close to $15k) would exacerbate my feelings. Help.

Just want to say you’re not alone but there are no magic answers to what ails us. If you’re stuck because of family, finances etc then unfortunately the only thing you can do is to live with it. I find CBT strategies helpful. I reframe away from being the victim into acknowledging it’s my choice and I have a toolbox of tricks to get me through the day.  When the feelings are, as you say, destroying your soul to the point that it makes getting out of bed every day so bloody hard, the best thing to do is to approach your GP and ask for a mental health plan and seek out a counsellor who might help with the intrusive thinking (CBT, ACT). I’d steer clear of antidepressants but the condition you describe is most likely situational depression, cured only by removal from the situation.  When you’ve got your head around your thinking and how to manage it, invite your OH into the process to work out ways in which there can be compromise on both sides but certainly making them aware that you’re feeling like sh!t because you’re in the wrong place. 
 

Good luck, you can do it!

[alex-op]

It took me about a year to realize that Australia was where I wanted to settle. Initially, the excitement of a new environment masked the challenges, but over time, I fell in love with the lifestyle, diverse culture, and breathtaking nature. The supportive community and opportunities made it clear that this was the place for me. However, everyone's experience is different; some find it sooner, while others take longer. It’s a journey of self-discovery, and you'll know when it feels right.